Halloween Havoc.

I like to try and enjoy Halloween as much as I can. It’s my kind of holiday. It’s a good excuse to eat pop-corn and watch loads of horror movies (yes… that is pretty much what I try and do all year round, but at Halloween, it’s official.) Had a nasty thought at the weekend that UK TV could be really bad on Halloween. That Halloween night might be a bit of a let down when it comes to good horror movies, and so I did a bit of panic-buying online and ordered a few films. A couple of oldie Universal monster movies, a Amicus classic, and what I hear is a very good modern horror movie from a year or two back, that’s meant to have a terrible, terrible ending (that’s terrible as in not very good.) I then got buyers-remorse at ordering this small pile of DVDs and not trusting my own TV services to take care of me over this spooky season. Knowing my luck, the TV would be red hot with creepy treats this Halloween night and these films will remain unwatched in their boxes. That I had overreacted. When I got my TV guide today, I flicked straight to Halloween night to see if I should start to feel guilty, and what TV another version of me was going to be watching in a parallel universe that night (the version of me that had held his nerve over the weekend.) At first I thought I’d flicked to the wrong night, and quickly rechecked the date, but no. The big Halloween movie this year is Halloween: Resurrection… you know… the one with Busta Rhymes… you know… the worse one of the lot. The really, really bad one. All I’ll say is this, I REGRET NOTHING, and parallel universe me probably feels like he’s just been gut-punched.

How can TV give you Dead Set one year… and then this year, Halloween: Resurrection? For me, watching the first Halloween is a bit like watching It’s A Wonderful Life at Christmas. A nice treat, but only to be done every other year. Sticking on one of its piss-poor sequels (the worse in fact) ain’t the same thing. There’s so many good horror movies out there. Why? It’s lazy programming. You wouldn’t diss Santa like this, would ya TV? I might become a Pagan, just so I can complain and say with this gesture you have insulted my faith. Halloween 2 might have been forgivable… but Resurrection? Someone needs to be burnt in a giant Busta Rhyme’s shaped Wicker-man for this. Can you send Goat’s heads through the post?

I’m just feeling glum because I’ve got the flu. Feels like my lungs are half their normal size. I sneezed earlier today and the force and stress of the sneeze made my legs go and made me need to sit down or I‘d fall. Sad, but true. Feeling soooooooooooooo sorry for myself right about now.